It’s 12:25am. It’s officially a Thursday, and I have been throwing it BACK. I’m not usually one who milks the whole “Throwback Thursday” phenomenon, but I’m usually the one who finds myself wanting to.
(Just some insight, and a disclaimer: I love writing, and I regret that the practice has left my regular routine. This post is more of a free-flow. It could get messy, and branch out like crazy. This is just me dipping my toes back in the water, with a desire of diving back into it, and rekindling a passion. This blog is for me. A breather. You’re welcome to read on if you wish.)
(Another disclaimer: I’m forcing myself to upload this tonight.)
(….Yeah, that’s about it for the disclaimers.)
This whole thing started with me going through my planner, computing my income from my hosting and voice-over(ing) activities, and logging them into my accounting journal (Yezz. Quite the responsible one tonight. 😉 ) Looking back at all the things I’ve done for work these past few months, and these opportunities to develop my skills in my craft, meet new people, and also get COMPENSATED for doing so just blew my mind. It left me incredibly thankful. God is SO graceful, and amazing for allowing me to tread through the places I’ve visited, and build relationships with people in their times of success, progress, promotion, and celebration. (All praise to He who loves us immensely more than we deserve.)
Took a break from doing my taxes, had dinner and watched some Brooklyn 99 (Best show. Samberg rocks.), then I found myself thinking “All right. This is it………. TIIIME TO EMPTY MY PHONE.” (My phone is too full for its own good). So I went through my camera roll, and literally thousands of photos that I’ve been meaning to upload for months now, and just felt the task of uploading tower over me… But I was committed to do it. I went to my laptop to check my Facebook albums and see which point to pick up from. Next thing I knew, I was browsing through all my old albums, and photos…. “Wow. Braces looked terrible on me.” “Woah! Ex-girlfriend! :))” “Look at how close we all were as friends.” “Wow… I did so much at school pala.” Next thing I knew, I was playing Kimbra on Spotify and thought to myself “Let’s write about this.”
Now, why do we post throwback pics?
It could be to…. Humble brag. Hahaha. Like “This happened a year ago. People. Don’t forget that I did that, and how awesome that was.” or…. wow…. I was gonna type in more reasons, but wow. It’s a touchy subject isn’t it? There’s just this intense connection we have to the past. Whether we’ve gone through good or bad experiences, it’s just so hard to get those associated emotions with those moments out of our heads and out of our hearts. Of course, there are many seemingly good reasons to keep these feelings of love, affection, resentment, even up to hatred associated with these memories, but the issue I feel that is most important to address is: “Is it wise?”.
It can be so easy to jump into old pictures, old music, revive old feelings, think of “what could’ve been”, but before you let it get to you, try to remember “Who am I?”, “Who do I want to be?”, “Is this helping me become that person?” (If so… Proceed), “Is there something more beneficial for me to spend my time on right now?”
Life sways us. Emotions sway us. Constantly following our emotions, like it or not, will lead to our demise. “Spend, spend, spend.” and end up wasting everything you have [this goes for spending your emotions on someone too. (Not all emotional investments will yield favorable or beneficial results)] or “Don’t spend anything, don’t spend anything, don’t spend anything” and find yourself missing out on life, or the opportunity you’ve been waiting for.
People say “Follow your heart.” But, remember. The heart is deceitful above all things (and beyond cure. Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9). So guard you heart above all else. Enjoy the throwbacks. They’re awesome! But keep them in check. Throw it back to the moments that remind you who you are, remind you of your purpose in life, and the people who inspire you to love unconditionally.
These are my thoughts tonight. Hope you enjoyed! Happy throwing of the backing. 😉